As some of you already know, this last year and a half has been very difficult on my family and I. In the beginning of this year I suffered from a traumatic brain injury that was so difficult and distressing that I have begun to see a trauma counselor to help me process and heal. I find myself not who …
Pain suffering
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No Friend, Suffering Is Not Relative, Not Even A Little
rel·a·tive /ˈrelədiv/ “Adjective – considered in relation or in proportion to something else.” I can’t tell you how many times I have heard people say “suffering is relative.” To be honest, in the past I have been guilty of saying it a few times myself. One thing I have learned over the years of my life and the many trials …
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When God Seems Scary
How do I trust God again? That’s the question I keep on asking myself. I keep on reading all these books on suffering from brilliant men and women whose greatest trials seem overwhelmingly insignificant. I don’t want to hear someone tell me to trust the Lord when their greatest difficulty still allows for breaks and downtime. I have no downtime …
Faith Pain suffering
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Lessons on Prayer from the Garden of Gethsemane
I don’t think people grasp the extent of my injury. In a trial, as a Christian, I should have access to hope, peace, grace, a sound mind, a spirit with no fear, God’s presence, etc…unfortunately because of my injury, none of those are present. My mind is so confused that sometimes I say “I don’t want to do this” as …
Faith Pain suffering trials
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The God Who Doesn’t Sleep
And He came to the disciples and found them sleeping, and said to Peter, “So, you men could not keep watch with Me for one hour?” Matthew 26:40 As I have reflected on Jesus and His suffering in the garden, I have thought about how the disciples fell asleep three times while Jesus was praying nearby. I have read the …
evangelism Faith Outreach
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To Warn and Worship: Why I Write
I write about Jesus despite the knowledge that He has permitted me, in His sovereign will to be in my affliction because I know that no matter how I am feeling, He is still worthy to be praised. I won’t pretend that I am ok with my current situation because I am not, and being dishonest serves no one. If …
Faith suffering
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Jesus, Man of Sorrows
It is hard for me to write right now. I am in a lot of pain. I started my wave today. Every part of my body is in pain, to include my brain. I read somewhere that the brain can’t feel pain…correction…trust me, the brain can feel pain. It is an odd feeling and gives me anguish! I am in …
Faith fellowship Pain suffering
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Love One Another: The Gift of Friendship
I began my 5th-month post-injury on the 6th. It has been a heck of a rollercoaster already. There is so much I have learned already and so much I am still learning. I see the Lord’s hands in different ways since my injury. One thing I have seen is the way that the Lord uses friendships during our most difficult …
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Just a Hard Day
The last few days have been really hard for me. The central nervous system (CNS) will do whatever it needs to heal. For me, my CNS has decided that ramping up all my symptoms is what’s necessary. It is hard for me to manage where I’m at. The symptoms I have dealt with today (they change daily) are dizziness, confusion, …
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Jesus Knows My Suffering
The other day a friend came over and said four words to me “What happened to you?”. The question was humbling and clearly had to do with how undone this trial has made me. It was a hard question for me to receive as I am still wondering the same thing myself. What has happened to me? I can’t explain …